Writing your own wedding vows is personal and very special. There really isn’t a set formula for non- traditional wedding vows but there are a few things that you can keep in mind to make sure they are memorable. Your wedding vows are a symbol of your commitment and will help set the tone for the rest for yourunion. It’s important to remember that while your guests will be a part of this moment, your vows are between you and your partner, so always do what’s right for you.
1. Consider the length and format
Before you go ahead and plan the rest of your ceremony, consider the length and format of your vows as this could affect the proceedings. In terms of when to start writing your vows, about a month ahead is more than enough time.
2. Work independently at first
To avoid influencing each other’s words, rather work on your vows separately at first. And because youwill be working on them about a month before your wedding, most of the planning will already be done so you can really focus on putting your heart and soul into your words. It is a good idea to discuss the length and format of your vows with each other before you get started though.
3. Ask yourself questions
Before you start writing your vows, ask yourself why you’re choosing to be with your partner. What aresome of the things that you love most about them? Asking yourself these types of questions will give you a good starting point for some meaningful vows.
4. Use a format that works for you
If you feel the need to draft a poem instead of writing your vows out in a letter format, do that! There are no rules – this is your wedding. You may even want to swop some of the traditional wording such as“till death do us part” for something else.
5. Stay true to you
Your vows should come from your heart. There is no need for them to be overly formal if that’s not whatyou want. When you stay true to you, your vows are automatically more meaningful. For example, ifyou’re not good with comedy, don’t force a joke or two into your vows.
6. Be prepared
If you’re comfortable memorizing your vows, that’s great. However, don’t cause yourself anyunnecessary stress as this could detract from this special moment. Rather give a copy of your vows toyour maid of honor or officiant to ensure you don’t miss any of the important parts.
7. It’s ok to get some help
If you want a little help before you get started, speak to your officiant before you start writing. You’veprobably already spoken to your officiant about the type of ceremony you want to have, which meansthey’re one of the best people to ask for advice before you start writing your vows.
Your vows are your verbal commitment to your partner so give them the time and attention they deserve. And most importantly, enjoy the process.